The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Today, I went down to Seattle to see a Perinatologist.  Here in Bellingham, they do not have any 'high-risk' pregnancy specialists.  In fact, they do not have a ICU for babies if born before 34 weeks.  I went to Seattle and saw a group of specialists that I had actually seen with Caleb.  If anyone had not known, I had a SCH with Caleb as well.  By the time I saw a perinatologist with him, the doctor told me the size of the SCH was insignificant and that I would most likely carry a full term baby, with no other complications.  I did!  Caleb was born 4 days before his due date.  Sadly, the news from the Peri today was not the same.  

So I will first focus on the good before going into the bad and ugly.  Everyone likes happy news!  In my baby gender poll, two thirds of you said it was a girl, I had thought so too!  At least I had before 14 weeks (3 weeks ago the tech said she thought it was a boy)!  But---the gender is now official (or 98% official they say), and the baby is a BOY!!! Makes things easier for me!   The doctor said the baby looked great, no problems, questions or worries with the baby.   We counted all 5 fingers and toes on each hand and foot.  

(This is a picture of the face, in 2D ultrasound, the images show bones, so don't be scared!  You can see the mouth and eye sockets, and kind of the nose)

I had an ultrasound before my doctor's appointment.  The technician spent 45 minutes taking measurements and looking at the surrounding area.  She said that she wanted to show the results to the doctor and would then be back, to say I was done.  I waited forever for her.  A good 10 minutes and then some went by.  I thought maybe I was confused and had misheard her, maybe I was done after all?  So I toweled off my slimy tummy and was opening the door to leave, when she came back and said no, we're not done.  She wanted to look at a few more things and take more pictures.  Her being gone so long talking to the doctor and coming back to take even more pictures (after 45 minutes worth), I knew something had to be wrong.  Because I've had so many ultrasounds, I can read my anatomy pretty well by now.  I knew she was looking at the placenta and I could see the dark area underneath.  I prayed that it wasn't the hemorrhage, but what else could it be? After another 10-15 minutes worth, I was finally done!  It was then time for the doctor's interpretation of the ultrasound.  I was shown to the exam room and had my blood pressure taken.  The nurse said, 'well, thankfully your blood pressure is really low, one less problem to worry about!'  Knowing the Ultrasound tech refused to give any information (a bad sign of things too) I asked the nurse if the SCH was still there.  She said, 'oh yes, it spans the whole length of the placenta now.'  Having done research on this particular condition, I knew this is the worst possible place it could be.  The SCH had spread considerably.  

(Here is a very basic drawing of the problem, the membrane separates from the uterine wall, leaving a pool of blood, preventing the two from going back together)

The doctor then came in to give me all the ugly news.  I really liked the doctor today, she was fantastic, but it was her job to tell me the facts, and not sugar coat anything.  The SCH now measured over 9 cm x 3.5 cm x 3.5.  It had nearly quadrupled in size from 2 weeks ago.  The doctor at the Bellingham practice had told me to increase my activity, obviously he was wrong and it was way too soon.  In that time, so much bad had happened.  The doctor went in to the 'ugly' part, saying what exactly this meant.  It meant all kinds of potentially horrible things.  The SCH could cause placenta to completely detach, the placenta could die slowly, slowly cutting off nutrients to the baby, the SCH (which is blood in the uterus) could cause the uterus to contract and send me into pre-mature labor (which I did have regular Braxton Hicks contractions for 2 hours the past 2 nights and has scared me to death, thankfully they eventually subside), the contractions could also shorten my cervix (which it has done, but it's not at a dangerous length), also my water could break due to the pressure exerted by the SCH and labor would follow.   The doctor didn't know what would happen in my case, but she did say this is something to be very worried about, that I'm not making a big deal out of something small, this was a major complication (b/c of size & location) that opened the door for many other problems to happen.  She had seen many patients with hemorrhages, but mine was a bad case, a large SCH in a critical area.  Basically there was nothing positive, except the baby looked great at the moment.  The doctor's goal is to get me to 30 weeks.  I know it's in the Lord's hands and I believe miracles can happen, I just hope I can be one of them.  Stay baby stay!  We love you too much already.

Trick-or-Treat

Get ready for pictures!  I LOVE Halloween and finally this year, we were able to celebrate it a bit more!  Kind of silly since I'm on the 'take it real easy routine', but with my mom coming out to help this last week, we just had too much fun!   It's the best when you hear kids coming up and saying, "cool house!", even if the kids saying that are only 8 years, it makes every minute of effort, totally worth it!  

Earlier on this week, we made ghosts, aren't they fun?!

What's Halloween without carving pumpkins?!  The yearly tradition has become especially fun, now that Caleb can be more involved.  

These are pictures of getting ready to carve...

Caleb does not like his hands to be dirty, I was lucky to get this shot.  One time of touching the gooey pumpkin guts and that was it!  No amount of coaxing could get him to do it again.

Are you sick of all my pictures, I warned you, there are lots of them this post!  I love these bottom two of Caleb looking at the lighted pumpkin.

Caleb was fascinated by the carved faces and how the pumpkins glowed.  

After pumpkins, my mom, John and Caleb decorated the outside with cobwebs, skeletons and purple lights.

And of course the good stuff, HALLOWEEN night!  Here comes Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!

Someone else took the picture below, but is this just not the cutest close up shot?!

Even if Caleb was tired, grumpy and refused to do his super Caleb pose, he still made an adorable Buzz.

After Caleb had taken off his costume and ate a few of his treats, I asked him if he wanted to go trick-or-treating next year.  His response:  "No, not again". 

 I'm sure he'll change his mind! :-)

A day at the park and more news!

Yesterday was a busy day!  I have tried to do a few more things recently, seeing if there are any repercussions, so far so good.  We all went to the park before my ultrasound yesterday.  I have only been out and about to my appointments, I have been missing out on all the fall colors!  At the park, I realized how beautiful the trees are, I'm sad I've missed so much!  Even if I couldn't run around and play with Caleb, it was nice to get out and do something normal.   

After the park, it was on to my doctor's appointment.  This was the first time John could make it to the ultrasound!  We saw the little baby, wiggling around.  The hemorrhage had not changed from the last time, so it's still there, we're hoping my body will reabsorb it.  At least there is no bad news to report, only good that everything is right on track!  Here I am, 14 weeks and 5 days, only another 5 weeks and I'll be half way!!!  For the big news, we asked the ultrasound tech if she could tell the gender... well, she didn't want to say.  I guess she's never been wrong after 17 weeks, but before then, it could go either way.  So she checked, just to humor us and said it looks like a.... BOY!  I was completely surprised!  I have been thinking it was a girl this whole time.  Maybe it's because I've been so sick this pregnancy (and wasn't as much with Caleb), but I was leaning towards a girl.  There was only one time, during an ultrasound, that I thought the baby looked boyish.  I then reverted thinking it was a girl afterwards.  Caleb and John have been solid on thinking it's a boy, maybe I should have listened to them.  After all, little kids are often more in tune than us!  BUT-- Nothing definitive yet!  The ultrasound tech said she has been wrong at this stage in pregnancy and seen girls looking like a boy at this time.  So I can't say for sure!  But it is fun to guess.  In about two weeks time, I'll be able to post an official gender to the baby!

Alright, if you all want to see my progression so far, I've posted pictures below starting from 8 weeks in my pregnancy.   I've waited to post until I've gotten a bit of a bump, well, it's happened.  This last Sunday, I looked in the mirror after my shower and said, the day has come, I have pooched!  Now keep in mind, the last picture is the most recent!

8 weeks pregnant

10 Weeks 

12 Weeks

Yesterday (Monday), 14 weeks and 4 days pregnant!  Even if I look like I gained 5 pounds from 12 to 14 weeks, I actually lost weight from my last doctor's appointment.  I don't know how your tummy pooches (not to mention the rest of you) when you haven't gained weight!  I think the nausea is subsiding a bit, so I'm sure I'll gain my appetite back full force.  :-) 

Quick Update!

Here's the latest!  After another doctor's appointment and ultrasound two days ago, we found out the hemorrhage has shrunk, yay!  From 5.4 cm x 2.7 cm, it is now 3.5 x 1.2.  We love positive news!  We hope the whole area clears up in the next month and I can move on, just in time for the holidays!  We have another doctor's appointment in a week and half, so I'll keep you posted with the results!    

As a side note, I was hoping that starting my 13th week, some of these pregnancy symptoms, namely being sick, would lessen, well, not yet!  This morning I tried fixing some scrambled eggs, knowing protein to be excellent and much needed at this time.  As I was mixing the two eggs together in a bowl, I felt an overwhelming revulsion at just the sight of what I was doing.  I felt the all too familiar gagging coming on and before I knew it, I couldn't stop what had begun.  I couldn't get away, I was latched to the kitchen garbage can for a good 10 minutes and I hadn't even cooked the eggs yet!  Yuck, just talking about this story makes me sick!  

 

Another week down

Every week seems to bring something new, sometimes good, sometimes bad.  This last weekend could definitely be categorized as bad.  I suffered a terrible bleed, I really thought the end had come.  Thankfully, not all was doom and gloom.  The baby is doing great and growing right on schedule, oblivious to the turmoil and stress around him/her.   Though this is wonderful and to be celebrated, we did find out a bit of bad news at today's ultrasound.  The hemorrhage in last week's scan had shrunk to 2.5 cm x 2.5 cm, but because I decided to make a few beds, get ready and unload the dishwasher on Saturday, I suffered the consequences with hemorrhaging more than ever before.  (I really cannot do anything, so incredibly frustrating!)  The scan today, revealed the hemorrhage is the largest it's ever been, measuring 5.4 cm x 2.7 cm.  It's terrible to regress instead of progress, those beds and dishes were definitely not worth it!   I'm sorry for everyone who reads this and is completely bored by the same news and posts (not to mention all the ultrasound pictures!), but I must keep it up for my family and those faraway friends who want to stay updated!  One of these days I hope to be a SCH (sub-chorionic hemorrhage) graduate and have a happy, healthy pregnancy!  Until then, I'll have at least another month of watching movies, crocheting my baby afghan, working on picture books and watching lots of football with John. :-) 

This is a bottom up shot, literally!  You can see the legs and the bottom, though it's hard to make out on an ultrasound.  I asked the ultrasound tech, if she could make a guess at to the gender, but she said all babies pretty much look alike at this stage.  And to eliminate any confusion, the arrow is pointing to the leg!  I have my guess as to the gender, but what do you think?